I Find It Hard To Sleep or I'm The Reason They Invented Ativan

I can't wind down because

There's a

Long line, a

Loud gray string of words,

And I'm quaking,

Literally shaking in

Bed, trying to wrap

My mind/tongue 'round them.

I can't wind down.

***

My truth is tree branch

Splitting, meth jagging,

Lie spitting, offshoot

Greens and Yellows...

 

My truth is yes and no

And "Never-Knowing"

Insecurity.

 

And talking too much.

 

If ignorance is bliss then

This moment is riot frenzy

And cut throat panic;

 

This is self awareness.

 

This is looking into the Mirror.

 

***

 

 One more:

 

My eyes are 2AM crosses and

The screen extends

Approaching borders of sight insane.

 

Type. Tick, take the airplane thoughts,

Jet engine screaming sonnets and the

Firetruck roaring whispers

To bed and sleep.

 

And sleep.

 

My eyes are 2AM crosses.

 

And sleep.

 

***

 

I can't stop now:

 

This has become compulsive:

 

I. I(2) The sleazy politician

On my tongue and in my mind

Was stunned and word-

Less when I stood and

Said I could not stay and

Listen. Turns out I mis-

Understood her.

 

*I don't know why I'm writing about this*

 

I(2) I, I to the nTh degree,

I in many forms and in-

Finite facets, I

Am I am I am.

 

Awake

Asleep

I am a dreamer waking

One night at a time.

 

To be

More specific.

 

I am a sleeper dying

One dreaming moment in

Anti

Time or is it

The waker walking

Through life with

Dead dreams and

Blooming sanity

 

And is this all nonsense?

 

I think we know...

 

Or let me be specific.

 

I'm dying every moment I'm alive.

I'm living every moment I'm asleep, waking or

Dreaming and it's paradoxically

Simple. Don't you get it?

 

Awareness is God's(?)

Hilarious joke....

 

What must the dogs think?

 

***

 

Goodnight.